Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Overkill
I got my hair cut 2day, looks weird in my opinion then again i was never much bothered about the way my hair looks, if i had my way i'd be bald. Anyways, i was reading 5 People You Meet In Heaven on the way there. I didn't really process the book on my way there, frankly speaking i was more struggling to stay awake, been feeling sleepy for no apparent reason in school and generally during the day for some reason, i slept quite early last night thats the problem. But as i got off the bus and walked to the barbershop i started reminiscing and i realize i'm pretty lucky, my childhood is like a park away and given the close proximity it is to where i live now, i can't remember the last time i was there for any reason at all. It changed a whole lot, thats a given but the memories came flooding back and i guess that kinda helped to drive home the whole W.H lesson i had about man conquering nature and then nature eventually overpowering man and somehow someway cause of that change becomes an absolute, that it is imminent in our future no matter how we try to change it. In a way, somehow i think the title of this post is cause i'm overkill-ing myself with too much thinking, the exams, my fate in MI just to name a few and a couple of unmentionables. I always thought exams were things that required you to think there and then and then its over, guess i forgot about the path we walk before that. One more week yeah? Then maybe the sun will shine brighter and we'll all come out again.
thought @
8:11 PM;
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Verdict
After such a dragged out session of stressing for the results of staying on in council Mr Tan finally revealed them to us this morning. The 4 of us are staying so pretty much what's left is the Promos. Can't say i'm totally confident about it and i'm studying for it to the best that i can cept i've decided to just focus on the H2s, lets face it other than GP i dun think i can pass math as a H1 for now. I blame it on the times i made the reckless decisions to skip math and well didn't really spend the time fruitfully, cause as you can see there are no fruits to harvest here. Anyways, the whole stress and tension of so desperately wanting to know the verdict has been made and quite frankly now i'm stressing for the interns and i heard that they'll be told about how they did this Friday so come hell or high water i'ma be there. Should the worst happen i'll see you guys through the whole journey, thats a promise.
"Has it ever occurred to you the reason why you haven't found the right way your soul smiled was cause you never let me into your life?"
thought @
9:51 PM;
Thursday, September 17, 2009
MC
An actual MC is scary, a legit one i mean, where you're really sick instead of skipping school. For one you can't get to sleep and with the stuff that's been happening in my head i'd really like to just shut it off for a while or at the very least drown in out. Hence the splitting headaches. Once more its times like these you really stop at the pace you've been running in the race of life and reflect about certain things, cept i only did that just now during dinner, yesterday was spent stoning cause i was getting used to the meds, yes they make people drowsy but sadly not drowsy enough to sleep. I'm speaking for both dudes and dudettes here, you guys ever had that one person that when he/she crosses your mind your heart beats faster, your eyes widen, little sweat beads start forming on your forehead, you start breathing faster and your mind just freeze and for that split second you feel as though your soul is complete? Yeah i kinda miss that feeling. Cept i never really felt it with the last bit, save one girl. I know its the last thing that should be on my mind right now with the promos 2 coming round the corner in like, what, 2 weeks? Yeap, i've been counting down though the stress hasn't really forced me to study more than i have been. I think i'll feel it the moment the weekends roll around then i'll freak out, take my notes and do some studying. Sorry just thought i'd post this for the people who're wondering what the hell goes on in my mind. Just a sneak. Study hard beautiful people, don't retain, CTE or get superannuated.
thought @
8:46 PM;
Monday, September 14, 2009
Off the bat
Its 6.19am and i'm online only reason being i couldn't freaking sleep and there's school later to top it off my nose has been flowing like a river since Saturday... Ok i did sleep but that was from 11pm to 1am so yeah that was a really great nap... I've no idea how i'm gonna survive school later... Wish me luck man...
thought @
6:18 AM;
Friday, September 11, 2009
Furball
Reality check. I'm tired, not so much cause its 2am and i'm still up. More of i'm tired of having to give the same hustle everyday with a different flow and there's still pretty much nothing to show for it. Its heartening to know that i ain't the only one in this dead end path walking it for mandatory reasons but it wouldn't hurt to break free of it no? So here i am, sitting in front of my laptop at 2am in the morning thinking about 2mw. I don't really know why i am though, its just this habit i have. Either that or i ate too much prata just now to sleep. I was just wondering, what if we all lived as though that day was our last day, would things turn out differently then?
thought @
1:44 AM;
