It'd be a lie to say that you mean nothing to me but i guess some things aren't meant to be. Its not like i see you on some higher pedestal and definitely not the other way round but maybe just maybe we're more than 2 worlds apart. Time and time again i find myself stuck in the same rut and making the transition from wanting to wait it out to just wanting to get the hell away. So i guess now would be that time for me to get the hell away. Maybe in another life, another time things would've been different, i'm tired of trying and i don't wanna try no more. I still wish the best for you and if ever, you can always find a friend in me =)
thought @ 10:50 PM;
Monday, December 29, 2008
Sweet talk extraordinaire:
"When i look into your eyes, i see hope, happiness, relief, passion, splendour and all those rolled into one feeling i can only describe as watching the tv, simply cause your eyes are reflecting it. Now don't move so i can watch the simpsons."
thought @ 11:34 PM;
2008 is coming to an end. Wow... truth be told, as a kid i never knew i'd get this far, as a kid i never knew a lot of things anyway. It was more of hide from the world and hope they don't see me and notice me. That way i could live my quiet mundane life. This so doesn't seem like me. Instead i grew up to be noisier than any kid living in the block, i was practically bouncing of the walls in every confined place i was in. Truth be told, when i came to M.I my mum kinda pleaded me not to make so many frens, put it bluntly be a social outcast, by my standards luh, (she told me make as lil frens as possible) but looking at the friends i have and at how the year 2008 turned out, i'm glad i didn't listen. I met some friends whom some people, sadly, only dream of having in their lifetime and if anything, if i could model myself to be anyone, it would be like you guys, giving selflessly, there to listen to me when i feel like bitching, laughing with me cause i have a weird sense of humour, people like BPC, Derek, Faisal, Vicki just to name a few, you guys were totally rocking 2008 for me and i thank you guys. Derek your morning greetings are definitely one of a kind, for as long as i live i will remember, "Good morning slut."
On a lighter note, i just googled some stuff and found out i've a strained/ torn hamstring HAHAHA freaking funny man. Time to get the ice out the fridge, c'ya =)
thought @ 5:29 PM;
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Nothing like going to church on a Christmas Day to celebrate the coming of the Messiah, Jesus Christ himself =) The drama today was really off the hook, it was way cool and yea i'll definitely have to say that i enjoyed myself throughly. Before time runs out and i've to wait another whole year, Merry Christmas one and all. May it be filled with all the love you'd ever need in the world and more. God Bless, always.
thought @ 11:12 PM;
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Whatever i post here is for everyone to read right? So lemme just say something here being the eve of Christmas and all. It's cliche to say most of the things but know that i try my hardest to make it up for the times that i don't say it through the things that i do.
Christmas Wish
Covered in warmth, away from the shadows More than Christmas cheer could bring Like when spring comes and brings the swallows For you guys magical Christmas wishes i'd sing
For your happiness throughout your lives Overcoming every shortcoming no matter what That as friends being there we'd try And even if not we'd know we're in each other's hearts
That not only on Christmas day itself Friends and family gathered round You'll all feel love and love itself Feeling like it's been true love you've found
For those with a bluer Christmas than usual To wish it away with some Faith Cause no matter what life's still beautiful Somehow i hope you'll see life's Grace
So with all the love in the world I wish for you guys your own Christmas wish For whatever aspirations or dreams to unfurl You've got my support, i promise you this.
Merry Christmas guys =) hope you all have a beautiful christmas out there, in every possible way. God bless you all.
thought @ 8:51 PM;
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
#1 The first person who tagged in your blog is: Jeremy? Either him or Kelvin, can’t remember man. Poem blog is Melswee...
#2 Your relationship with him/her: All of them really cool friends =)
#3 Your impression of him/her: People that i can trust. (Keeping this simple aren’t I? LOL)
#4 The most memorable thing he/she has done for you: Cos they’re good friends they’re there for me no matter what, how much more memorable can it get?
#5 The most memorable thing he/she said to you: Too many. Oh wait, “BPC” haha
#6 If he/she become your lover you will: Weird...
#7 If he/she become your lover, thing(s) he/she has to improve/change will be: NXT! #8 If he/she become your enemy, you will: What went wrong?
#9 If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be: Probably something dumb
#10 The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is: TALK TO ME. I’m bored LOL
#11 Your overall impression of him/her is: People i can hang out with a whole day and not get bored
#12 How you think people around you feel about you? I dunno, ask them? Eh.... This guy called Moo. #13 The characteristic(s) that you love about yourself is: I’M ALIVE. Long story but you’ll know what i mean.
#14 On the contrary, the stuff you hate about yourself are: The fact that i’m severly broke now and stuck at home? Nth else i guess
#15 The most ideal person you want to be is: Barack Obama! Hmmm myself would be fine now
#16 Say something to those who care and like you: I miss you guys.... the holidays suck without you guys and why does this suddenly feel like an interview?
#17 Pass this quiz to 10 people (tag those with blogs): 1. James... eh in NS so Ivan. 2. Kelvin 3. Arlene 4. Darnell 5. Shaun 6. Kang Wei 7. Jonathan 8. Melswee 9. Fiona 10. Joyce
#18 Who is no.6 having relationship with? That i ain’t sure i gotta go check.
#19 Is no.9 a male or female? Female o.O
#20 If 7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing? !!! LOL no? #21 What is no. 2 studying? Poly
#22 When was the last time you had a chat with no. 3? Eh... last week
#23 What kind of music does no. 8 like? I dunno, i’m guessing random genres
#24 Does no. 1 has any siblings? Nope
#25 Will you woo no. 3? HELL NO.
#26 How abt no. 7? DEFINITELY HELL NO
#27 Is no. 4 single? Thats a mystery
#28 What's the surname of no. 5? Moo LOL! My Brother uh
#29 Whats the hobby of no. 10? Flying, freakin cool LOL
#30 Does no. 5 and 9 get along well? I think they will haha
#31 Where is no. 2 studying at? S’pore Poly
#32 Talk something casually about no. 1 HAHA HELLO IVAN! HAHA Your Batista Deck against my Goldberg Deck anytime haha
#33 Have you tried developing feelings for no. 6? A long resounding NO and never will
#34 Where does no. 9 lives? AMK, singapore
#35 What colour does no. 4 like? BLUE
#36 Are no. 5 and 1 best friends? HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
#37 Does no. 1 have any pets? Nope. Unless you count random insects then yes.
#38 Is no. 7 th sexiest person in the world? eh.... no?
#39 What is no. 6 doing now? Having a holiday enjoying himself and soon doing this quiz. HAHA
thought @ 8:41 PM;
Me life is boring me life is lame me life so bad my england go insane. Yea thats pretty much how bored i am now and for the times i spend at home...
thought @ 12:21 AM;
Sunday, December 21, 2008
I think as life goes on you get more and more surprised with the people around you, Narin calling telling me he feels bad and misses his ex cause they broke up yesterday, the "sporty" side of my dad when he talked to me about golf, just to name a few. I realize that at the end when you think you've got a full hand of cards and can read them really well, life kinda twists the rules and you find yourself playing a whole new game. 2day's charity event made me realize 2 things, kids, no matter how fortunate or unfortunate they are, they'll always be kids so if you wanna make their Christmas, give em toys. That and any day coupled with fast food is a wonderful day for them. You see a different side of humans too, the humble i'm so damn glad to be here side. A pri 2 kid giving up the chance to buy a nice pair of jeans so that he can buy 2 more T-Shirts for his younger brother. A younger brother taking care of his older brother and allowing the whole world to see how lucky he is to have a brother. Made me remember how cool primary school was you made frens with everyone and anyone, where hate was something you said for fun and never meant it in the least bit. "The world is a playground, just that when we grow up we tend to forget that." So so true.
thought @ 7:59 PM;
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Dear Ofelia: I don't really know how to tell you this, but the mafia wants you. I think I realized it last year at the mental hospital and I saw you sit on my best friend . I'm sure you're man enough to understand that there is no solution to this . I'm returning your memories from the military service to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I never openly mocked to ruin the second world war. Best Regards, Kenneth.
RULES: Do the "Letter MEME". Tag no less than 5 other people, and leave them a comment, informing them that they have been tagged. Then copy the "How-to" Letter Meme, and finish your Journal entry. How you do the Letter Meme:
Dear (the last person who sent you a message): I don't really know how to tell you this, but __1__. I think I realized it __2__ __3__ and I saw you __4__ __5__. I'm sure you're __6__ enough to understand __7__. I'm returning __8__ to you, but I'll keep __9__ as a memory. You should also know that I __10__ __11__. __12__, -Your name-
1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister
2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes
3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kabob - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife
4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out
5. What's your favourite colour?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - me
6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C. - Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed
7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover
8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service
9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college
10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked
11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water - Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics
12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - F*** off now
France - In Pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family
thought @ 11:05 PM;
Friday, December 19, 2008
The holidays so far have been messed up, couldn't care less anyways, desperately, yes DESPERATELY tryna figure out how to make Christmas more interesting. I'm going out with BPC =) hehe but thats after Christmas, who cares anyway, i miss those guys truckloads. I wanna go caroling haha that'll be fun, but it'll be a weird bunch though, but a fun bunch nonetheless. Caught YesMan 2day, i dare any idiot out there to say yes to anything for a year. Make a covenant with yourself 1st. Now go jump off a building, without the bungee cord. Thats what you get for being a overly enthusiastic yesman. The plot was ok i guess, as usual, love story tied in. The trailers told me The Duchess is coming soon, after Pirates 1 - 3 i'd have to say i'm a Keira Knightley fan. Maybe not, but it seems pretty interesting, abit of history if you will. Then there's the one with Adam Sandler, i keep forgetting the damn title (Bedtime Story?), i forgot. But i definitely wanna watch that too. Now to see if i can get more cash since i decided not to work the holidays...
Merry Christmas in 6 more days, i'm so screwed.
thought @ 12:57 AM;
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Although it never really bugged me in the beginning, it seems to have some kinda delayed effect on me, after Mum told me i wasn't planned for i just thought that Dad was the most responsible person i knew. In some ways, yea he is, but whenever they quarrel its like i'm the damned cause. Like these 2 people could be leading way better lives but they're not cause of one mistake. Dream over, guess i've woken up, its no damn walkthrough, i've got "other kids" to match up to that i don't even freaking know. Makes me wonder where was the point where i stopped bothering. Mike where the hell are you....
thought @ 11:00 PM;
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Stranger
Stranger
Your life i can see in your eyes All the pain that you keep inside It matters not that you stand across the street Cause someday i know that we'll meet
Round the corner, behind a shelf My heart calls to you by itself All this time we couldn't see That somehow our lives were meant to be
Then one day, caught in the rain Love's fairytale truly began A simple gesture of sheltering her Sealed their fate, together forever
Somewhere else, miles away Strangers beginning, they turn away Never knowing what life holds Always dreaming about the untold
There's always a chance that you might meet The perfect princess, for the ladies, prince Rest easy, that they're yours to keep They won't fade away, they're not dreams
Love is magic, love is true Love was meant for me and you One day we'll look back and see Love started from 2 strangers You and Me.
~Moo
thought @ 5:09 AM;
Monday, December 15, 2008
I want to plug in and escape from this world, night times are what i look forward to cause its when my parents come home and it becomes a war zone here, just what i need after a bad enough day. Anyday spent at home is a terrible day... I know i'm not supposed to say that about my home cause it IS my HOME but seriously, has anyone ever been in my home for 24 hours and say its a cool place? I need to get away from all this... oh and i just found out Mama's going for an operation on Thursday and Cream (my hamster) is probably gonna die, since he's walking on one side only and his right eye is beginning to look like its glued shut. I hate myself....
"On Christmas, you're supposed to tell the truth... ...and i just wanna let you know, you are beautiful." Yes you are and no i can't say that to you cause.... well... cause for the first time in my life i'm scared to lose someone who doesn't even know i exist, much less care about me.
thought @ 7:13 PM;
Sunday, December 14, 2008
When your nose is clogged up, don't go outside on a rainy day. Even if it is to eat your lunch... stay home and drink hot soup or sumtink. Just some advice from someone who had to do it... Anyways, just came home from grocery shopping for tonight's hot plate, yes, i'm gonna have hot plate when i'm having a sore throat and flu and fever =) its either i eat or i go hungry =) so i eat. Majority of the mornin was spent rearranging the christmas tree. Then i tried teaching the silly puppy how to sit. I've succeeded with the presence of food, take that away he just runs off to play with his penguin... maybe if i kidnap the penguin? haha i'll make Peanut wear antlers for Christmas =) if i can find them that is, if not i'll go look for twigs and branches, D.I.Y man.
Please let my nose be cleared by tonight so i can sleep properly, thank you
Amongst the bright lights, you shine the brightest.
thought @ 2:24 PM;
Saturday, December 13, 2008
This is bad...
thought @ 9:15 PM;
Sometimes i wonder if what we have is really what we're supposed to have. At some point i just think though i'm not as good a person i would like myself to think, on some level or in this case many levels, i don't really deserve this. Even if i did, the rest don't. So why is it that they're pulled into this and having to suffer? Actually, the main point of this post is WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU?!?!?!?!? Don't you think that you've got some sense of responsibility over us? I don't even know where the hell to start cause i'm disappointed in you. I look around and see other people and i think they don't have to live with a sad excuse, why do we? You always compare us to "your people" ever stopped to check with yourself?
thought @ 2:04 PM;
Friday, December 12, 2008
I need to start the holidays, its really really more stressing than school... Genting was... ai'te, ask if you wanna know more, i'm kinda lazy to type it out here. Apart from all the usual family stuff, everything was ok, glad to be back though.
Wish for you on a falling star, wondering where you are.
thought @ 1:49 PM;
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Guess this'll be the last post b4 i head off to Genting, if its according to what's going on then i think i'm staying at mama house 2mw. So yeap i dun tink i'll be online haha, so in case i don't get the chance to say goodbye i'll just say it here =) Please do take care, i'm kinda wondering where you went to but i guess you're probably busy with stuff i just hope that you're fine and all's well =) maybe we'll get the chance to talk when i get back haha. In the meantime do take care and i'll c'ya soon i think haha =) bye and God bless, always.
A lil sumtink b4 i go, for some reason this song really speaks to me and i hope and wish.
thought @ 1:21 AM;
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Feeling very emotionally drained now, like happy just isn't happy and anger and sadness just ain't it. Fustration would be close but i wouldn't really know. I'd like to disappear though. Just fade.
thought @ 10:48 AM;
Friday, December 5, 2008
Peanut got a haircut, so i figured i'd get one too. I'm supposed to have long hair during the hols and i'm totally getting used to having long hair but i think maybe not now haha, i prefer to have a shaved head, well more or less around those lines and my head's probably gonna freeze in Genting, which wouldn't be so bad since most of my brain cells are probably dying and i need to find a way to preserve them. After yesterday, i figured that life is really like some drama show, like those where you watch them and think to yourself, this is never gonna happen to me or i'm never gonna see this in real life. Well, guess again... after all the shit that happened yesterday, i was too tired to even sleep... But for minah i hope everything's gonna be ai'te. For mat, i hope its not too hard for him either seems minor to us but it may mean a whole lot more to the both of you, hell, i just don't want you guys to make a mistake and have to regret it the rest of your life.
thought @ 11:06 PM;
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Frisbee training was... bitchass man, not running for i have no idea how long really does one on you. So imagine chasing a stupid plastic disc when gasping for air. But it was still ok luh... considering the fact that i couldn't really sleep thanks to Twinkle who kept jumping around the room. I have to practice more man.... i can't flick a stupid backhand throw.... back to the damn basics i guess. 3 more days to Genting =)
My body is killing me... I better go sleep...
thought @ 5:27 PM;
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
It kinda sucks cause i somehow feel i'm the only one caught in this thing again, its either i really don't come from this family or i'm just on a totally different wavelength from the rest of them... its like... it doesn't even matter anymore.
Mama can go to Genting =) thats a plus, and if i wanna sound selfish, the other partial reason is cause i wanna go too =) James can't go cause he's gotta go for NS and mine will be in a few years time. (Maybe retaining ain't so bad after all?) But in all seriousness, i'd rather get it done and over with than having to drag it out, like an injection, get it done and realise all the fuss was worth nothing...
The risk is there, for now it always is but something tells me its worth every damn bit.
Maybe there'll come a day when i'll mean something else, but for now i'll be content with being a nobody.
