Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Guess i should've known what i was on for from the very beginning, as funny as it seems and as much as i can't really do it, i'll go through it with a smile. No more complaints. Few more days, suck it and move on. Mama's fine now, after 4 hours of dialysis, stressed out night, the prayers, the begging, the feeling of helplessness and loneliness and the 2 litres of water out of her heart and lungs, Mama is better. Last night was one of the most terrifiying nights of my life. I couldn't sleep, couldn't even sit still. All that i felt was made worse when Mum came home eventually and said to me, Mama almost died, she couldn't breathe. As much as i know i should at least be mentally prepared, i can't. How does anyone prepare for death, whether their own or for someone who's close to them? Come to think of it, if Mama really said goodbye last night, i don't know what i would've done. and my head throbs cause of the damn fever i'm having... hopefully i won't be sneezing as much 2mw, i've gotta study for History since i threw Math out the window.
I've only got thanks to whoever that knew and prayed and prayed hard. To thank the Lord despite the messed up state i was in, He heard my prayer and made it better. Guess i've got the same advice to Mama to myself, Stay Strong.
thought @
9:49 PM;
